Remaining Positive When All Seems Lost

It may seem difficult to think about a better tomorrow when your today is so painful. A better tomorrow exist. You have to claim it. The emotions, the anger, the hurt, all will block what lies ahead because it prevents you from seeing it.

We get lost in..... why is this happening to me. Why doesn't my partner just treat me better and I won't have to go through this. If I could just make a good meal, dress a certain way, keep quiet. We come up with so many excuses not to see what is going on in front of us and to us, because the pain of taking that step into the unknown is often more frightening than the abuse. At least you are familiar with the abuse. It's just that ignoring the abuse can be deadly.

We can't just want a better life, we have to believe in the possibilities and put forth effort into it. Yes, it does take courage and a lot of it. It is there, inside of you. It is not someone outside of you that determines who you are. It is you. It always has been. The National Domestic Violence Hotline offers steps for you to take to get your life back on track. To get you back to the loving, nurturing being that you were born to be. It helps you to move on, to move on into who you are.

When you see how good you are you choose a partner who is just a good. The vibrations that we send out attract to us what we are. If we are unsure of ourselves, in our abilities, we attract someone into our space just as insecure. And we attract those energy vipers, someone who likes to take advantage of our insecurity. Just because we attract this person doesn't mean that we must allow them in. We have a choice. When we know our vulnerabilities, we can recognize them in others. We also can recognize other traits in others that may cause us harm. A violent temper, irrational mood swings, someone who only wants you to listen you them, are clues to a control personality. Walk away.  Determine what type energy you want around you and do not settle for less. It has been said many times before. You have to be the energy that you want to attract.

Sometimes we choose a partner to come into our intimate space for comfort, for security or because we think that that person makes us look good and we don't dig deeper. When we are our own comfort, our own security and need no one for image sake, we are better equipped to chose an intimate partner. Women especially often just want to be with someone and they ignore Spirit telling them that this is not the right partner for you. We become so caught us in the fairy tale of living happily ever after that we chose not to see the danger right in front of us.

It.......IS....... is a fairy tale. A tale made up in the mind of writers trying to sell a book. Real relationships don't necessarily go off into the wild blue yonder. A relationship is more about what did I come here to learn? You do not have to be abused to learn not to be abused. You simply have to honor the warning signs and walk away.

Only you can determine what you want in your life. Be clear about it. Be firm. Don't get caught in the trap that abusive partners try to keep you in by constantly saying things like,  "I love you." "I won't do it again." "Honey I know that something is wrong with me." Well, fix it. But while you do. I am moving on. Some of us are bound by our religion to stay married. In my daughters case it was a youth minister fighting with her. That is not of God. If  you go to a minister and he/she does not direct you into professional help, shelter, counseling, etc. Then, certainly, I would question their ability to guide and minister. Some ministers are simply about themselves. It has nothing to do with God. Search for a greater truth.

Limit or completely have no contact with the NEGATIVE NELLIES of the world. Especially and including family.Deep inside of you you know that you are divine. A beautiful gift from God that deserves only the best. But the best comes through you not from someone else. Each day, dismiss the negative. Tune it out. Divert your attention. One of my favorite sayings when a negative thought comes into my mind, or  when I can still hear the residue of something someone said is, "Not today." I then think about a beautiful mountain view and get lost in it's glory. Think of what every brings you peace and savor the moment. Every time you do this, you are saying yes to joy and peace.